The self-sabotaging behaviors we engage in are symptoms.
In order to stop self-sabotaging, you need to uncover how it serves you and why. Well, that is until self-sabotage becomes the less comfortable option and we have no choice but to face ourselves and our lives. This is one of the big reasons we engage in self-sabotaging behaviors. They stay close to what feels familiar and reject what doesn’t, even if it’s objectively better for them.” As Wiest writes, “Human beings are guided by comfort. Human beings seek what they know best because it is what is the most comfortable and therefore safe. Comfort is the driving force of human behavior. Instead of being understood, you’re going to be seen.” 3. Instead of being liked, you’re going to be loved.
You’re going to build a new comfort zone around the things that actually move you forward. “The people who are meant for you are going to meet you on the other side. It may mean floundering for a while until you find your north star. This may mean you could become less liked and understood. This could mean losing relationships and friends. Wiest explains that many people avoid doing necessary internal work because they realize that “if they heal themselves, their lives will change–sometimes drastically.”
“Your new life is going to cost you your old one.” An example Wiest gives is sabotaging relationships because what we really want is to know ourselves (but also don’t want to be alone). In The Mountain Is You, Wiest describes self-sabotage as a coping mechanism, a means of getting a need fulfilled, usually a need we aren’t fully aware we even have. While it’s often believed that self-sabotage is the result of trying to punish ourselves, this is actually not the case at all. Self-sabotage is a means of getting an unmet need fulfilled (albeit in a maladaptive way). Here are five of the most profound things I learned from The Mountain Is You. But mostly, it helped me take my power back. The Mountain Is You has changed my life for the better. Wiest also details how to stop self-sabotage in its tracks and ultimately work with ourselves, not against ourselves. In The Mountain Is You, Wiest expertly breaks down self-sabotage, explaining its function and why we struggle to stop engaging in behaviors that only leave us stuck, unhappy, and empty. Then I read The Mountain Is You: Transforming Self-Sabotage Into Self-Mastery, a book by best-selling author Brianna Wiest. Your Zodiac Sign’s Weekly Horoscope For May 27-June 3.4 Zodiacs Who Should Put Their Mental Health First During The Long Weekend (May 26-29).I couldn’t figure out why I always got in my own way, tripped myself up, and ultimately never arrived at the places I wanted to be. While self-sabotage is a phenomenon I am deeply familiar with, it is a mechanism I never fully understood.
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